new chapter

Handsome little guy ready for breakfast.

Little did I know there was actually a dinosaur trapped in Allen's body this morning.

I hope he didn't do this at school.

This was the only non-Moore scowling photo I could get of Allensaur this morning.

I knew this day was coming.  At some points this summer, I was even counting the days until both of my babies would be in school (two mornings a week that is).  Other times, Allen was so honey sweet and generous with his smoldering hugs and charming company that I discussed actually not sending him with Colin.  Colin, knowing me better than I seem to know myself, insisted that it was time for the boy to go to school for real.

Allen, being my predictable, mostly even tempered child, was quite stoic this morning and got into his little car seat with his backpack (and Cora's doll's pillowcase filled with tiny cars) in hand and a quietly determined look on his face.  I am unsure what was going through his head but was shocked when it came time to drop him off when he took his teacher's hand without even saying a proper good bye or a hug for that matter.  Just as my heart was sinking, he released his hand from his teacher and came running for me with his arms wide open.  It was the best hug I have ever gotten from the little guy- not clingy or anxious, just a sincere, tender hug goodbye.  It actually felt like he was comforting me, his hug said "it will be ok mama."

As I drove away, the lump in my throat became real tears and I actually sat parked at the ymca, in a non-kid zone parking space for a while to compose myself.

So my morning was just fine. After it occurred to me that I had been driving 20 minutes with Cora's Vacation Bible school music still playing, it was nice to just have some quiet in the car.  But I still missed Allen and the spontaneous chasing him around the house holding his lion puppet, puzzles during lunch, his enthusiastic help cooking and cleaning and him picking up rocks and sticks ("dinosaur bones") everywhere we go together.

I think we (I mean I) will be okay.  I might even blow dry or hot roll my hair.  Read the paper and not just the headlines.  Maybe even go back to work outside of the home one of these days.  Or finally attempt to decorate the house.  Or make a dinner that takes more than an hour to cook.  Hell could freeze over and the next birthday party I host could look like something you have seen on pinterest (yeah right).

Anyway, happy end of the summer.  Happy end of an era.  Happy peace and quiet.

I guess.